Robin Berman, MD
How your clients refer to you:
Most clients find me after reading my book Permission to Parent, through UCLA, or by word of mouth.
Website: www.robinbermanmd.com, Email: Robin@RobinBermanMD.com
How many years have you been in business in LA?
I have been practicing in LA for 15 years. My psychiatry practice is currently closed, but I am seeing clients for parenting consultations.
How did you get your start and what was your initial inspiration?
I have always loved children. I went to medical school to be a pediatrician or a child psychiatrist, but during my rotation in child psychiatry it dawned on me that the best way to help children was to help guide their parents. I was inspired to write Permission to Parent when I noticed a trend of parents being so attentive and caring to their children, but having difficulty setting loving limits. We overcorrected for our parents’ mistakes and now the pendulum has swung to hyper-parenting, which is well-intentioned but not optimal for children.
What do you feel differentiates you from others in your field?
There are so many wonderful therapists, and I feel honored to be part of a profession that is dedicated to improving people’s lives.
What do you feel gives you longevity in this big city with so many options?
I deeply care about my clients. I try and create the safest space for them to be seen, heard, and known.
How do you positively impact your clientele?
I positively impact my clients by guiding them to be the best version of themselves. To dig deep, throw themselves enormous amounts of compassion for what they missed out having in their childhoods, but find the gratitude in the gifts they did get. Becoming a parent is a second chance to rework our own childhood and give our kids what we always were longing for from our own parents. The more insight we have into ourselves, the greater we parent or partner.
What is your favorite part of your job?
Watching transformation! It is an unspeakable honor to be trusted with a client’s deepest fears, wounds, shame, hopes and giant dreams. It is a gift that I am continually awed by.
What is your favorite secret LA spot?
My favorite secret spot in LA is not so secret – it’s nature. Los Angeles, with its eternal sunshine, provides an outdoor playground for adults and kids. The mountains and the ocean are places to reboot your soul.
How do you benefit mamas?
I benefit mamas by supporting them, and helping them become aware of potential blind spots in their own parenting. Once we are conscious of a pattern we are less likely to repeat it. Moms tend to feel so much responsibility, and also so much guilt. Our love is so deep we often get irrational about our own kids. I help hold a frame - a perspective, a loving space to explore their parenting without judgment. There is no such thing as a perfect parent. Great parents raise themselves so they can raise their child. Often, being a mom can be emotionally and physically draining. Moms need all the support that they can get!
What is the most memorable feedback a client has given you?
It’s always so gratifying to know that our work together made a client’s life better. As an example, one client recently told me that she had replaced the negative and critical voice of her mother with a more loving and compassionate one, and that she had passed that loving voice on to her daughter.
Pay it forward and name your top colleagues in the same field or related field:
I love the folks at The Center for Reflective Parenting. They have parent groups and individual parenting support. I think they are a thoughtful and insightful team.
What is the best advice anyone's ever given you? Or what is your "mantra" / words to live by?
Long after we are gone, our kids will remember how we made them feel. Hopefully they felt loved, cherished and celebrated for who they really are.
As moms, the day can escape us, what is your best time-saving trick?
The best time saving trick is to worry less and enjoy more. Parents today do too much and savor too little. We often spend our days racing from activity to activity when simplifying our schedule and being present is what our children really crave.